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When everything turns to nothing, I'll still be there for you.
•°~ガゼット~°• A live report [PART 3/4] 
20th-Oct-2007 08:19 pm

The thing is... when it had been our turn... it were already about 50minutes... 50 minutes had already gone. Fifty minutes of sixty. ... Gazette had already arrived there... at about 18.25. And they left... at about 19.33. And we had been there from around noon already... Imagine. Only those that had been there from morning until noon had had a chance at all. And we... got so lucky. Really... Maybe four or five minutes after we were done, Gazette got up and left... [... Ruki's sauntering... hee~] So many people still there, without nothing. But... it's PSCs rules. Not Gazette's. One hour is one hour, ne. ... It's so little though... The organiser person had told us in the beginning to please not... get hysterical or faint... haha! Well because obviously... 98% were female. *cough* Why... ever. XXD

~ H A I R ~
If I remember correctly, ルキ and れいた were talking/whispering quite a lot with each other. While still waiting in the long long queue (longer behind us though... much longer.) I once saw Uruha from Aoi's end looking over at れいた, laughing behind the backs of and 流鬼Ruki. His laugh!

ARGH! Why did they have to have such mesmerizing eyes... Now I'ld love to remember their lips. Though of course, in the overall picture, yes, I saw them... ... Aoi's smile. I was dazzled all along... and it was only 20 to 30 seconds all in all...

Kai's hair is so black... Actually I was fascinated by their hair. Uruha's was ALL OVER! It's like... everywhere! And it really really stands up like that... It just really seemed so... unreal. The hair, I mean. It's difficult to explain. They just really seem to have come from a different planet, sort of XD It makes them look bigger, taller than they are. It's like its own institution. The institution The Hair. Ze Hea. It was different to actually see it with your own eyes than seeing it on a screen. You could see how it had been worked with. And there was somthing else about it... I don't know... But really, it doesn't look like hair. It's one mass of... an institution XXD

I did NOT have to sleep at the station XD Tay had me over. She's one of the girls I met at the event. ^___^ My saviour, thank you so much. o(^▽^)o

~ G R A T I T U D E ~
I'm waiting for the train back to the Airport. ... What I had written a little while ago on my blog... "And even if I'm only gonna see them, it would be worth it"

... ... SEE THEM, my ass!... I got so close, how many people are enabled to be that close... I even touched them. All of them for G's sake! I was looking into their eyes, they were looking back, there so was a contact... (I'm crying) Keep the faith, ne... I'm so grateful. I can't even express my gratitude. I mean, I can, but... Even "I am extraordinary thankful" wouldn't quite hit the mark.

The train is coming... I'm still, not crying, but very close to. Furrowed brow, sniffing, heavy breathing. I am so thankful, and I am so glad that I can and could be so emotional about it. I somewhat know how they are in person. A bit, ne. ... I can remember Uruha's shiny outfit, the cross on Reita's back, Aoi's... everything.

They're not something you see on TV, or on any screen. They're real. どうかこの手が解けぬよ〜

Ruki's eyes seemed to be a tad red XD Either the good man is overdoing the lenses, or he had a bad night XXD And Aoi ... when I was standing in the queue, behind/next to him, a new song was coming up... Maybe Filth, maye Circle... he instantly got into the song, tapping with his foot [the boots! O__O So looong!], grinning and moving to the rhythm... *eeeks* He seems to like that song quite a bit
*cheers to dancing Aoi* /(^O^)/He surely is glad and proud to be in Gazette ^_^

Twist it... shake it shake it shake it baby...

Don't know why, it just came to my mind XXXXD... Come ON and let me see you shake your little tailfeather... TWIST IT! eheh... *giggle*

You could actually see that in everyone of them: They ARE glad. And a little bit proud of what they achieved. Proud of their fans, probably.

On the plane back... Just thinking of several things again... Thinking of Aoi... They had a lot of make-up in their faces, hehe... They wouldn't even have needed as much. I think I saw a sort of glitter too... in faces/hair. I think, Ruki had reddish lips. Aoi's were normal, but... peachy. *どきどき* Reita's had a very light colour, skin coloured. Uruha's were darker. Just a tad. .... Heh, so I noticed their lips after all. Well... Kai's grin. First, his surprise, probably because of the hand suddenly appearing xD, but instantly taking it with his strong hand [...], looking up, his face one single beam. I saw that dimple, his shiny teeth hee~ He IS really pretty. I loved his hair. I think they cut it a little... it was shorter in the back anyway. And though his hairstyle looked the most natural, it still seemed too unreal. All of their hair was. Well, maybe not Aoi's. It looked quite 'real' xD

~ M O R E B I T S A N D P I E C E S ~
Ahh... with his 'new eyebrows' he looks more innocent. Like a puppy. Hah. My ass XD... I love him...

And ルキRuki... there was something about him. He's not chubby, not cute either... maybe you could say that he just looks very comfortable... so cuddly. And his hands so warm and small... the least firm handgrip. I really could feel his warmheartedness under that tough skin. The way he has that huge cap on his head made him always lift his head a little awkwardly unnatural to actually SEE. Blue contacts... Beautiful Ruki. But he looks like MORE in real. It's hard to explain... it seems as if there was more to him, more about him. He appears... less little. Stronger. MORE. ...

Aoi's arms really are thin... Uruha's body looked so beautiful in those clothes... I kept staring at his beautiful hands when we still were in the queue and able to see him. Mole on his hand... *staresh*... I actually... held it? *twitches* And his profile... so Japanese, ne xD Aoi's lips actually really jump at you... when you see his profile. ... ... Rapes me rapes me rapes me.

Sheesh, I really need to EAT ... Actually I could do that while still reading... Doredake sakebi... I mean, writing. Yume dato Mmm so hungry. Got up at 4.25. I made it just like ~ ~ ~ to the plane. More delays and I mightn't have made it. I would have had 15 minutes... not more. Hmmm... I'm sitting on the far right, at a window, have the whole row for myself. The sun is just rising... shining through the windows on the left side. We're heading South. So hungry... Lovely, blinding sun. They got so many presents! So many!! They had to be given to the staff though. No giving in person. [unless it's a Heresy member's card bag hahahaha]

流鬼〜ℜuki... something about that man. His loving eyes. Sheesh...
Reita's little smile, his cheeky, smirking falcon eyes, or cat eyes, rimmed black as usual, his hauling handclap. And the 'cool' Haha... he's love. I like him ^_^ Actually, I was quite surprised. Never had a thing for him. Not at all. Still don't, but to be honest... he looks quite handsome in nature. ... He appears to be the one most fragile though. HE is the one who seems small. Aoi, Uruha... Aoi appears to be so TALL! He's supposed to be of my heighth, but... I don't know, ne. I mean, the piled-up hair makes them look taller for sure, yet, it appeared as if his eyes would have been higher than my eyelevel. ... his concerned furrowing of the brows and the pursing of the lips... rather 'schnuten'... pussing? [The word doesn't really exist in English] of his lips when asking if it was ok to sign the back. Hey love, I didn't expect you to do the FRONT. (=⌒▽⌒=) His grin... awww beautiful . The way his eyes look when he's grinning... you beautiful man.
But ... He looks so amazing. He is, in fact, stunning. His eyes... the shape. The cheekbones. The way his facial features change when he's laughing, or smiling. Love his haircolour. Light honey... It's SO MUCH HAIR though! They all have so much! Oh, not Kaisama... XD His smile... it's not a wide smile, not if you compare it to Aoi's or Kai's. But the corners of his mouth... Sheesh, Uruha's face. Ummm... the profile. I mean... both Aoi's and his profile are very distinctive, but I don't think you ever really notice Uruhasan's nose in shoots/PVs/... It's very Japanese. *grins* The... curve.

SHEESH! Aoi's lips... from the side... the profile. They really are jumping at you. Attacking you. He wore that black earpiercing I love so much, by the way. (*^^o)

LATE and at HOME

When I was lying in Tay's bed, waiting for her to get back from the bathroom, relaxing, thinking... [antagonism at this moment]... Again I was repeating pieces and bits of what had been happening. And I realised something. Everyone of them. Each and every pair of eyes had conveyed... love. When lying there I remember the fact that they see their fans as their 6th band member. What Uruha had said in an interview, that the fans confront him with all those deep, sincere feelings, and he just doesn't know how to respond to them but by playing his music. Ne. And they really were so glad about all those fans. I mean... you can see it when people love you... you can see so much in eyes. And I remembered that little detail when Kai was looking at me. How the confusion [about the sudden appearance of a hand XD] turned into an amiability when he was smiling, this amiability turning into something else when his eyes had found mine and had rested there for a moment. Whatever it had changed into reflected in his eyes. Gratefulness, love, deep feelings... Just at seeing my own true, conveyed feelings. [ehh... my eyes must have been sparkling miles with all those endorphines ^^] This realisation of actual love flowing back to me... to everyone who had made contact, I am sure... it made me cry again... It's just so much! So wonderfully much.

Oh sheesh... I just realised, later... that... what 流鬼 said to me... was for me ... Everything they did when I was there was for me. Just as everything they did for the others was for them. 流鬼 USED HIS VOICE on me. And he used it privately, not adressed at a hall of fans but at me. Surely, he's using it all the time to all the people he's talking to, haha, but still... it was his voice. Wait... it was... soft... rolling... smooth... silky... a hint of butter... but without the butter's fat... Rolling, yes. Deep, yet light, comfortable, enticing, lulling. Uh oh... Indeed.

And now that I have looked through the pictures I have taken [70% are either security/stuff obstructed, shaky or ... focused on somebody's hair instead of the guys xD] and I have seen on lj... I noticed that I hadn't even noticed that wasn't wearing his... lovely... lippiercing... ... well. Guess he's so blinding...
"Love, didn't you notice somthing... new about me?"
"Ermmm... ehhhh... *sweat* The... the... hair?"


And honestly... it is strange. Right now, as I am typing, I suddenly really remember the way Uruha's hands had felt. So gentle and smooth and cool... So lovely soft ~ not too soft, just... perfect. His beautiful hands... ... aarrrghhh

But honestly, seeing them on the pictures is so strange. Because even there they look so different than they seemed to look in real. It's a matter of perspective and 3D I guess... or 4D, 5D.

It actually felt strange even looking through the so well known pictures on my computer. I sat there staring, shaking my head in wonder... I actually... touched THAT hand? I actually did? ... I actually know what it feels like? I ... do?... ...
m(_ _)m

My mom was all eager to hear about it all actually XD She was like "And what about Kai? What about Kai??" hahaha... And when I was telling her about Uruha "Ahhhhhwwww... Nnnggg... oohhh..." AHHAHA! *loves*


21st-Oct-2007 08:16 pm (UTC)
*Groans softly..* I think you are making my eyes well up again. Just the way you describe it...so beautiful. The way you mention how they feel about their fans and how you can tell.

Maybe...someday......*sighs thinking about the description of Ruki's voice..Kai's smile..Uruha's beauty..Aoi's smile and hands..Reita's personality..*

Thank you for yet another post..*luffs*

21st-Oct-2007 10:53 pm (UTC)
hmm.. that's a.. total random comment but.. I love how you write/express yourself XD it made me feel like I was there, too *wishes* we won't meet there but.. we'll be under the same ceiling, so let's try our best to let them feel the love of their fans from overseas ♥
22nd-Oct-2007 04:15 am (UTC)
XD Random you say? I don't think so.. *laughs*

Thank you for your un-random comment ^__^
I'm so happy I'm going to go to their concert... ahhh...

Well. Only if i don't freeze to death while waiting outisde >__<

24th-Oct-2007 11:21 pm (UTC)
I feel like crying. My eyes are welling up. Yeah, I love the detailed work. I've been waiting for this part since when and I miss it since I was busy homeworking. ARGH. I'd probably remember that forever. -sigh-

-runs off to read part 4-
25th-Oct-2007 04:32 am (UTC)
(^^) Daijoubu ~ ~

Thank you. For reading, for feeling, I guess. I might write a report from the concert too X__x

I mean, I have already written it. Just a question if I'm going to type it, too, or not *lol*
6th-May-2008 05:37 pm (UTC)
Ok, so, I'm done with the next comment, as you know already ^.^'

First of all, sorry for my handwriting Oô it's a bit ... messed up at times. I was sitting on my bed again, but for some reason couldn't write as good as on Sunday XD
Also ... I've been drifting with my thoughts from time to time Oô
AND as for the scanned prints ... the things I marked orange aren't visible >_<'' (or only if you look VERY close) *grml* ... hm, but I think I didn't mark that many things with orange XD

So here you go ^^

Page 1
Page 2
Page 3
Page 4
Page 5
Page 6

Print 1
Print 2
Print 3
Print 4

So, that's it for now. There's probably so much more I could say about several of these paragraphs ... but words seemed to be missing. A lot. Hm.
But even though words were missing ... my heart jumped from time to time. Happy jumps. Sending little butterflies to my tummy ^.^' So ... words were missing. But if they weren't, they'd tell a happy story, I'm sure ^.^' (well, of course ...)


(oh ... the picture ... *drowns in memories* ... ...)
6th-May-2008 06:46 pm (UTC)
Hmmmm... Some people had breakdowns cause they made it. I think I saw some who had their breakdown because they didn't. I can understand that. On the other hand, you just knew when being outside of the circles that you wouldn' be able to make it. You know. It's sorta given.
Even us... we were amongst those that got in the last 10 minutes. Not even. So. Yeah.

And there were reasons enough for you to be there. For me, it would have felt unfair the first moments, too, but in the end, see what you got out of it. Love. Ne.

...whot? you's smoking? *never gonna kiss you again* >_<

Even though you think your handwriting is terrible, I still can read it XD

Hm. Those pics... uh yeah. Hm. Well I've never heard anyone say 'no handshakes', and I saw people doing it before me, that's when I was set to do it. And. ... Yeah. There's a picture of me in front of Aoi while he's looking up and ... all.


Depending on what side you are on at the moment, reality or dream are farer away...

And yes. I do that often. I've done it before. I also did it during the signing: Thinking of them without make up. And it always makes me smile. Because... I don't know, but it gives me a feeling of peace. Not so much because without, they look far more normal and ... 'average', really, but also... well. I don't know. It sort of enhances their already exisiting (inner?) beauty. It really makes me smile, a lot.

Eh what? not commenting you writing aoi? *doesn't see any aoi anywhere* *wonders if she got blinded by it XD*

Aoi un-japanese? XD lol. He's got... hm well. An unusual but still very Japanese face ....ohgodsthebrowthebrowthethetheeyesthegARGH . hah. hm. Well. People say Mao doesn't look very Japanese *hysterical laugh*

Hm. Uruha... i don't know if he was sick. I thought he looked sickish on the concert though. Him and Ruki (AHA?? O_O) ... well. Erm. But still, he totally rocked out, after a while of... not. *heart jumping higher at the moment when he... did... cause she wasn't not a part of that development within him

About Toguro. I translated that once. It's one of my favourite songs. (tried to translate would be better). And yes. I recognize Aoi's voice as the screaming voice... and that... killed me so often. Defectivetragedy It means a lot to me. I'm uh. well. Sometimes I feel like the song. (sometimes when I don't know how to explain my feelings, to some people I just say like... 'chizuru'. And then they know about how I feel. I can feel Toguro too, or kyomu... hm. Well. You get the picture, I guess.

yeah. "damn happy". I... know what you mean. Too happy for happy. Find another word for it. ne. Euphoric maybe is good but... not it.

To the prints
Yeah, they totally did not think that so many would attend the event. They so didn't. We all knew. Could see it in their faces even.

Omgs, your markings are pure love again xDDDD I can't even comment them xDDDD

ahahah the HAIR yes xD My review seemed to be a lot about hands, eyes and hair XD lol... erm ^ ^""

"Aoi's everything" now makes me have dirty thoughts =__= ... lol? ^ ^""

Aww comeon... you'd love to see Aoi twist it.. and.. shake his.. um tailfeath..e..r...?
*cough* And yeah xD He definitely is proud... the little supaasutaa ahahaah *loves* *really loves*

AhhhTHERE IS THE KANJI! Kommrausdubistumzingelt mehehehe. (it's terribly cute xD) And it doesn't suck xD Looks more like a children's <33 *giggles*

*grins* hahah... 'no comment' at the erm. Jumpiness of Aoi's lips, eh? xDDDDDDDDD *just laughs* And you don't want to know what his earpiercing has been doing to me =_="


And I hate your msn. For the past what 10 minutes? Ah and there you go again XD
6th-May-2008 07:18 pm (UTC)
Yeah, sori for my msn *grml* I'll look for that other messenger tomorrow *scratches head*

Hehe, we went outside for some minutes when getting off stage and went upstaires shortly before Gazette left again. So I might have even seen you *g*
(this thought amuses me XD)

And yes ... I ... hm. being there saved me, to some extend ^.^' So. Yeah. (I knew ... felt it would. So I didn't give it away.)

Thanks a lot for your attention *leaves stage*

*gets back* XD

And they really said no pics, no handshakes shortly before Gazette entered the hall *g*
Well. I guessed by the reactions that those really wanting to do it would do it anyways *g* (why haven't I? *grml* *pouts*)

them looking more natural: "It sort of enhances their already exisiting (inner?) beauty." ... dito. absolutely.

Well. Of course Aoi looks Japanese. As I've said .. I was ... fooling myself with it *gg*

Uruha was coughing quite a lot, as far as I've noticed. Poor him.

Oh ... do you still have that translation of yours? ^.^' (Toguro)

Could see it in their faces even. ... definitely Oô They looked ... quite shocked and nervous rather early already XD uneasy. Or however one should call that *g*

Looks more like a children's <33 ... fuck you for making me blush terribly ... XP ... not nice *hides*
(a children's? is that ... bad? good? both? embarrassing? *pouting*)

A- ... ah wait, I've talked about the msn problem already XD
7th-May-2008 06:15 am (UTC)
*laughs* Whaaa~~~t? Why does it make you blush so hard when I say it looks like a child's? xDD *cant follow what's up in your head* And... it's just cute. Neither good nor bad nor embarrassing... I guess xD

I'm joking XD It's just... cute? ^ ^""

And I really didn't hear that with the handshakes. About everything else, but that totally got lost. Which is good. Cause else I mightn't have done it (unless people in front of me still had given them their hands) Fucking policy anyway... the organizers are just behind having as many people served as possible, which in a way is 'fair' but in another totally restricts those utterly beautiful moments for the others..

The Toguro ''translation''... yeah I have that online. It's not a real translation, just a try to explain the images behind each line as far as I understood them. More guessing than anything. You should find it when you go on my translation tag. ^ ^
Roaded on Aug 24th 2017, 9:01 am GMT.