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When everything turns to nothing, I'll still be there for you.
Horrid Exams 2/4 
28th-Jul-2009 06:28 pm
Ruki despair
And I guess somehow I gotta 'announce' this too, somehow ...

Horrid, terribly important exams 2/4


I'm like dead. My circulation is ... I don't even know. I'm not shivering anymore, and I think my heartbeat is okay again, had a bit of sugar just now so ... it's getting better.

I looked rather pale and sick when I got back home... which was like... 18:20ish.

I was supposed to have my oral Japanese exam/test at about 16:30 (the poor lectors had held the tests since the morning...), but it had been made clear to us that it's normal to be about half an hour until several hours late.

I arrived at about 15:45... it was my turn about... 17~ish. I don't know, I didn't check the time.

One turn before ours, 村田先生 would come out and give us both the 敬語Role-Play-Card and the picture we were to describe later. So we had about 15 minutes to prepare for those.

Well, whatever our seniors had told us was true, we all were sitting on the corridor, at first a group of five, later about 10, waiting, trying to help each other with the roleplays and pictures, and not freak out.

Which wasn't that easy, as everyone who was finished, upon exiting the room either went like "uhhh... *breathes*" or "oh Gods it's over!" or "....... *collapse*" or... "Hmmm... oO' " ... or "They're really friendly but..." ... or... "*confused look*... argh?" or "Oh gods, the questions... o__O""

... the questions, oh Gods. Right. Keep cool.

After a group of four of us were through, they would be called in again to get to know the result.
There already had been two or three people who hadn't passed... one had had a total blackout → failed.


One of the girls before me... when she went in to get her result... it took ages for her to get back out.


The next one to go in came back out in a couple of seconds.


I didn't take any further look at my 発表/presentation or the 自己紹介/self-introduction. I had already seen myself failing when I saw the presentations of some of my colleagues. I mean, we had been told to talk about anything within one of the given topics (social problems nowadays/problems with translations from Japanese books into other languages/does mankind progress), give a couple of examples, and all in all that should be abou~t 2 minutes.

Easy-peasy? [Actually, no.]

Hm. -__-'

Well. Some of the others had huge tables, had researched topics, talks with at least 15 sentences, hu~~~ge gargantuan talks... so I kinda panicked a bit as I had uh... eight sentences or so, all of them just rhymed together from what I know with a couple of dates but well.

"Here you go, ganbatte~"

After Louise had gone in [one of the 1.0 candidates, highly educated, and super-rich at that, her whole demeanor one of "Aaaa dyaa~ well tuh~"... erm. So, someone I can't really stand ... that much], I got my two sheets of papers.

When I saw the roleplaycard, I was somewhat relieved... When I'd seen Thomas', I'd doubted I'll ever make it. The pattern in itself was simple, you just had to ask the teacher a favor - depending - and then reply to whatever he says and react to whatever outcome there was. All in 敬語, or, humble/polite speech, whichever.
Thomas' card was... Gods, it was so long, with words I've never seen before, he needed a couple of minutes to make sense of it, I was so sure I'd never make it with one of these... couldn't concentrate on keeping any new words in that state.

So when mine was merely about wanting to apply for a sort of internship at a Japanese company, but not knowing how to write the needed CV ... it was... okay. Somewhat doable. [though I still failed to remember those two words, but it was okay, I could check them on the card]

The picture I'd been given... well. I'd already started to black-out slightly. My nerves were I don't even know, my heart went too fast or too hard, can't tell, my circulation was really down, but I tried.


Six people on the picture. Three of them with cameras, three of them sitting behind a desk. Probably anchormen, announcers of some sort of news-show. Some ornaments in the background etc.

In itself not that hard but.

Suddenly all the words are gone.

Kay, カメラマン。カメラ。What's "to shoot/film" something? Suddenly no idea. Yeah great, 映画を撮る, but that wasn't a movie, it was some 番組。
I had no real idea what to say apart from that. I couldn't get anything into my head. It was like... "take the plunge and try to swim without arms"

Mouさん tried to help me... aw, he's such a nice guy. He's half American, has been to Japan for a year already, so he was there for a counselor for all of us. Which was kinda helpful... he helped people look up words, he even wrote a couple of the descriptions for some. Just I couldn't really accept any help... simply because I didn't know what he could have done.

Me: *just staring down at the paper, pushing some buttons on the electronic dictionary, aimlessly, probably like ;@;*
Mou: Should I look up any words? *worried tone*
Me: Uh... nah... *staring* ... *shaking head* I... don't know...
Mou: Hmm... *not giving up* [♥thankyou...] well... *looks at picture*... what's on it... camera people...
Me: …カメラマン… *weak smile*
Mou: Nnn, yeah right, that'll work... and this?
Me: Uh... *blank* Don't know... Newspeople... speakers? I don't know... ;-;
Mou: Ahh *concentrates* whatsit in English... *looking up a couple of things*
Me: News...speakers...uh?
Mou: *shaking head in thoughts* No... no that's not what they say ... hmmm, アンカーマン should work.
Me: *nodding dazed, scribbling it down*
Mou: *trying to help with a couple of other things, pointing to things in the picture*
Me: *trying to find words*
Mou: *trying to help as best as he can*

... *sigh* Well. I think it helped a bit. I couldn't really get anything into my head but well. He has a calming aura... well no, not calming, rather... soothing.

Then Louise came back out. One or two minutes later, I was called inside.


Phew. Kay, sitting down, hello, konnichi wa, first the self-introduction, including subjects, place of residence, hobbies, and a bit of extras. I remembered to speak slowly. Which acted beneficial.
Further... it went rather smoothly... only that that doesn't mean it went correct. 8D

高橋先生 had to ask me about the subjects again. No idea, but I seem to like the sound of ほうおう [of course. 鳳凰様] more than of ほくおう [北欧] which it should have been... but yeah, smile and wave, smile and wave "I'M SO SORRY, actually I meant...", smile and wave. And yeah, I'm not studying pope-linguistics. *sigh*

Senseis asked me a couple of questions... as expected about WHY I chose my other subjects. Cool, don't even really know a good answer in any other language. I'm interested in the one, and the other I don't care about? ... Said something the like...

They were satisfied with that part pretty quickly. Then, on to the picture. Oh hello there, fiend.

One of the others had said that it's most important to just keep talking, just say anything at all, they want to hear that you can actually talk.

So that's what I tried to do... and even if most of it will be あの〜 and まぁ… and whatnot. I can pretend that I can talk it, alright~

Somehow I made it through that part, too.
Senseis asked me whether I thought the picture had been taken before the... 放送 or after, and why. Could answer that, sure. Then, to my amusement, they asked me what アンカーマン was supposed to be. Gladly 村田先生 was courteously asking 「アナウンサと同じ?」so I could just say that I thought so. Don't remember whether there were any other questions.

Next one was the role-play.

No memories apart from that I was able to talk all the time, even though I'm sure there were a couple of mistakes, but I sort of covered up, somehow.
And I know that... lol... ↓

The thing was, sensei gave me a book that I should read - it was telling of how to write CVs. So I accepted it thanking and said that I would come again tomorrow, if it's yoroshii, to have it checked by him.

Takahashi: O___O" You'll have finished it that fast??
Me: ... *ponder 'oh right... book... reading... writing...* Oh yeah, sure I can =D
Takahashi&Murata: *laugh* Oh well then, that's fine!
Me: ありがとうございまーす... 失礼しまーす…

Ugh. After that, the 発表. Lol. Maybe I should have warned them that the topic was kinda 暗い… When I started talking about people being killed and all, at least Murata's face went kinda o---o'
Hm, surprisingly I didn't falter through the whole thing.

The feared questions... weren't that hard. Probably because witch-hunt and the expelling of mentally ill long time ago were so shocking, they didn't really know what to say to that. Good for me. I was asked whether I thought that everything from back then was bad, and things now are all good, I told them that I didn't think so, they didn't want any further explanations, next question.

Sort of managed.

When I left... and closed the door behind me, I just wanted to collapse.

"Soooo~~ how was it? How did you do? *curious looks*"
"Ughh... was okay... well... we'll see..."

Everything felt so much better afterwards, of course. Apart from my circulation.
Had to wait about half an hour more, then our group of four were finished, and one by one we were called inside.

Louise came out pretty soon, well, さすがに。Then me.

First thing 高橋先生 said after a couple of words of greetings and どうぞ座って下さい〜 he said...


And I didn't care about anything anymore.

He showed me on what scale my grade was, what my grade exactly was, and told me what he thought should get better (my not-so-Japanese 発音, or rather, my uh deriving-from-Norwegian-as-I-fear stress, also she knew one thing, but they were like "It's all okay at that level you're at now, it's a~ll grand so... move on from here~ *smilesmile*"



So these two are cleared. Next one is on Thursday, translation. Then Friday, the feared huge thing about practically anything. Both of them written.

Hmm, my blood-pressure is still somewhat off. But I feel better. Maybe I'll be able to do stuff today, but... I sort of doubt it. We'll see.


;-; *nestling into someone she just imagines to be there*
28th-Jul-2009 06:19 pm (UTC)

Wow, sounds like really hard exam. Oral exams were my worst nightmare-_-; I'm so glad you made it, and with nice results:D *feels proud of outori-chwan* <3

For two more exams - ファイト!!!
28th-Jul-2009 06:42 pm (UTC)
Maaaa 'okay results' *laughs* But.. thanks for feeling... p..proud of me hee~... (^///^)’

It wouldn't have been hard at all if you'd already been in Japan and could at least speak fluently and all... but most of us can't... so ... ugh~ I'm so glad that part is over and done with... for now *breathes*

Roaded on Sep 23rd 2017, 11:45 pm GMT.