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When everything turns to nothing, I'll still be there for you.
Morning Call [One Shot] 
7th-Aug-2008 02:21 am
uru drama
Title: Morning Call
Author: outori
Rating: NC-17 for cursing
Pairing: Ruki x Uruha
Genre: Humor
Warnings: Not beta-read. Bad language. Suggestiveness.
Disclaimer: Not owning anyone in the story, only the story, as usual.
Synopsis: Ruki receives a surprising phone call ‘early in the morning’ that doesn’t exactly make him happy… or does it?
Author’s notes: Hey yes, I’m back. This is the first humorous fic I’m posting. (Though I’ve been writing some before… unfinished so far x-X) I started this one a couple of months ago - it was supposed to be just a short, quick one. It’s still short, ne, but I wasn’t able to finish it before now. ^ ^” Anyway - enjoy

Too. Fucking. Tired.

I’d already been awake… or at least, sort of awake, when my phone started ringing. Has the ring-tone always been so gallingly annoying? I honestly can’t remember. It penetrates my skull like small hammers that had just been taken out of the forte… Makes me groan before I pick it up, pulling a face and answering rather dourly.


“Ahhhhhhh say say say, you seem to be ti~red…”, a well known voice resounds from the other end of the line -- Ouch. I snarl. That teasing tone just really hurts my ears.

“So what”, I snap back. I’m not in any fucking mood for teases when I’m goddam tired, okay?

At the other end, just a short chuckle. “Oh well. Too much hot sex last night?”

I was just about to grunt something like ‘you’re damn right’, but his tongue is just too damn quick.

“Oh no, I forgot, couldn’t be that… You only have your porn, unfortunately, the sexy something is missing in your apartment.” I could practically see him looking over at the mirror in his bedroom while saying that, scrutinizing himself. Not that I know where he is, right now. “Being. Me.”

I just roll my eyes and snort back, “Ah shut up Uruha. I’m sexy enough for my self.” Why am I thinking of his bedroom anyway.

“Are you really?”, he’s mocking.

“Yes. Now why the Hell were you calling so fucking early.” No patience.

“For a fact I know that it’s not you who can wake up after 4 hours of sleep with totally ruffled hair and marks of the bed-sheets all across the face and still look damn mind blowing.”

Gods, would you please stop that?

… For some reason though, that image of him with disordered hair, just waking up and looking damn gorgeous doesn’t help my present situation and why the heck is that thought distracting me at all. . . Trying to push it away with a grunt and some mumbling. “And that person wouldn’t be you either.”, I grunt.

“But of course it would.” I can hear him beaming. I really can.

Fucking tease.

“What was that? Did you just say something?” Oh yeah, he was grinning from one ear to the other. You just have to know his voice. You’d know, from its tendencies. The sound of it when he laughs, when he tries not to laugh, when he’s distressed… all those nuances. Um. No, why, I didn’t just spend a lot of time paying attention to his voice, really, I just generally tend to pay attention to voices.

I almost had forgotten that he’d said something, quickly shoot an answer into the phone before he could “… No?”

“Just what I thought. Ne, Ruki…”

“Yeah, what.” Actually, I just want to put that damn phone down. I have the feeling that this phone call won’t doing me any good at all. It hasn’t been doing me any good so far anyway. I feel all … too… tingly? Why the heck --

“Where were your thoughts drifting to, just now?…”

Ack. I hate him. I fucking hate him.

“Nowhere, fucker. Now, why the heck were you calling?”

He’s laughing. Godsdammit. Fucking laughing at me. I really want to put the phone down, just hang up, you know, but I can’t. I just frown and wish he could see me frowning so he’d stop. Though… would he really?

“Are you frowning, Rrrruki?”

What the heck? “Eh?!”

“Nah, what’s that pant for. Thinking about me are you?”

“Shut up, fucker.” I’m shaking. I’m fucking shaking. Just put that damn phone down. It’s too damn early in the morning for calls like these. And what’s on his mind anyway? Must have had a damn good sleep to be so fucking cheery-uppy and all.

“And by the way, it’s 10am, not early in the morning.”


“Just in case you were thinking anything close to that.”


“Not that I know what you’re thinking.”

“… yeah you…”

“Though actually I know very well what you’re thinking about a certain person.”

Ah Gods, it’ll never end, will it. I sigh. A deep, long sigh. I really want him to get off that topic.

“Now who would that be, huh.” Holy damn. Why am I keeping it up then, when I hate him going on. Fucking cat’s cradle. I always have to be so stubborn and have the last word ... Trying to lead away now. “What’s bitten you anyway?”, but damn, I’m sure he’ll have some sharp answer ready for that one.

Luckily, he’s not catering to it. Everybody who’s partaking in this little discussion knows anyway whom he had had in mind. Surely not the pope. Unless the pope is wearing garters in his spare time. … Yuck.

“Hmmmmwell. Just open your door.”

“… Huh??”

“Come on. Just open it. There’ll be something for you.”

“Uruha, what the heck…” Despite me frowning I walk towards the entry to my apartment. Curious about what that ‘something’ might be. My curiosity is my personal curse, I know. Can’t help it though - I have no idea what he’s playing that weird game for, but since he’s already in it… and well, somehow I just want to know if it’s a prank of his, or if he really dropped off anything in front of my door, and if he did, what and why. So maybe… it won’t hurt if I did as he said?

Yet, when I find myself standing in front of the closed door, I can’t move. I just stand there and frown at it.

“Ruuuki…”, a voice coons from the receiver.

“Nngh”, I grunt.

“Ruki, just open your door. It’s just an early morni- well, a 10am-present. Come on.”

Very funny. Well, okay, why not. Won’t be a bomb in front of my door now, will it? Won’t be some crazy ass assassin, right. So I reach out my hand to the doorknob, squeeze and turn, the door swings open, and -

I almost topple over.

“Hello there Mr. Morninggrinch~”, a far too, far too fetching man purrs right in front of my door. I just stare, unable to say anything, unable to move.

“Hehe,”, he cuckles. “Not quite the bomb you expected now, was it?”

I scowl, remaining silent.

“But hey, much more explosive either way.” he grins, and sways. Perfectly styled hair. Make-up. Make-up? Why make-up? Perfectly curved, mockingly smiling lips. A slender neck with a mole that I’d just love to suck on and - no I wasn’t just thinking that. Delicate shoulders, a body wrapped in a thin white shirt that would make it possible for me to guess his actual shape underneath and revealed far too much skin to be anywhere close to something you’d just show off in public, a black leather belt with an alluring, ornamented silver buckle that kept the evenly black pants perfectly in place, and my gaze wanders lower and -

“Like what you see?”

My head instantly jerks back up. Fucking shit. I hadn’t just been staring all this time now, had I? I wasn’t just totally staring at every inch of his body, was I?

“Err…” is the only sound I make, gaping at him like a full-time idiot. Fucking bastard. Is he wearing contacts? I strain to see, and immediately am taken aback by the kindling fire in his hazel brown eyes. Damn. That is just too much. I just got up, gimme a damn break, okay? Can’t fucking handle so much… uh… whatsit, beauty? in the morning.

He just grins and looks down at me with a look as if he could read my very thoughts. Damn. This whole situation is unfair. I’d kick him so hard in the balls if I… if I weren’t so…

“You seem so paralyzed, Ruki. Are you feeling well?”

I blink and stare up into those so terribly amused eyes. Pray to Heavens if there really is any God up there that is not on Uruha’s side right now, please just somehow assist me. I swallow. Find my voice, luckily before any sound could drop from his already parted lips.

“NO, I’m not feeling well,” I bark, “No matter if it’s 10am or 6am or whatever, I just got woken up by a fucking prank call and I am not in the fucking mood for any fucking jokes right now, I’m tired and sick of things and don’t have any patience at all for - “

That’s were I’m suddenly stopped as two slim hands come wrapping around my waist and pull me close.

Just what the fuck is going on? I feel my face heat up in seconds, only marginally realize that I’m only an inch away from his body now, his radiating warmth flooding me like a tropical heat-wave, making it hard to breathe and totally unhooking my rational thinking.

No wait, not totally. I’m still thinking totally logical, am I not? I just can’t… move.

Nor speak.

Just squirm lightly as his fingers playfully crawl up over my lower back, to my spine, pushing me closer still. Ho fuck. I try to recline, lean back, get away from him but…

“No patience, huh? Well you know, I don’t really mind, see, I thought, just in case you show up in front of his door and he really doesn’t have any patience, why not just give him straight away what he wants? After all, it was all meant to be a present for you so why not please you to the bottom of your heart.”

His words just flow over me like a waterfall, I have no idea what he’s actually talking about. What was that about patience? Is he blaming me now? What the heck is going on, why the fuck is he so close and what was that about please and why is he rolling his hips against me as he says that OH MY GODS SOMEBODY JUST HELP!

Yeah, I’m panicking, can you feel it? My hands are sweaty, my neck is sweaty, my shirt is glued to my chest, my breathing is practically non-existent, my hands and legs and lips are quivering, I feel like I’m about to collapse and surely it’s all just because I got too little sleep last night, right, I tend to be a bit weak when I only got so little sleep and surely Uruha is playing some stupid prank I’ll just stay cool and play along and I’ll be able to laugh about it later and and just somehow this will all be terribly funny and -

And his left hand in the small of my back presses me close, his right forefinger strokes over the corner of my mouth, having me swallow harder as I just stare at those plush lips, the amber fire in his eyes, the all too perfect face. His finger moves over my cheek, to my ear, and suddenly his hand is wrapping around my damp neck, the tips of his fingers doing things to my skin I’m not sure you could call innocent prodding … I don’t even know why, but whatever he’s doing makes my lower half tingle and pulsate in a rather unpleasant way, unpleasant because I’d rather have my crotch be kicked hard right now than having to go through this, this, now, with him so fucking close.

And what’s the reason again for why I don’t fight him off? I’m stronger than him anyway, am I not… Why am I not trying to fight him off…

“Ugh uh… Uruha.. uh…”

Maybe the answer is, because I’m an idiot? With so much foolishness about me I just can’t help but close my eyes. Maybe if I can’t see, things will get better? Just maybe? So I close my eyes, and just as I do, his breathe strikes my lips and makes me whimper.

“Yes…?”, he merely breathes.

Ho shit, his scent. I can feel his breath, feel his warmth seep through my skin, ooze into my veins, merge with my blood, his scent being venom to my very senses, I’m spacing out, I know…

“You’re not answering my question…”, he remarks. Gods, I can feel the movement of his lips so close to mine.

“What… qu… question?”

He giggles.

Had I asked a question? I can’t even remember. No wait. He said that he was asking, or at least, that I’m not answering and… oh fuck I can’t even think straight.

“Okay, let me rephrase my question...”, he whispers, fingers playing on my back, gliding to my loins, softly massaging what I’d rather not have him touched. Makes me moan. And I don’t want to moan right into his face, you know.

“Hmm…”, he ponders, his other hand making my nape feel as if it was on fire, “Well do you like what you… feel?”, he asks, his lips coming just a bit closer.

If I move my lips now, I know I’ll touch his.

There’s nothing to say anyway though, isn’t there, so there’s no real problem, yet though maybe -

No, I shouldn’t say anything.


I can’t say anything. Don’t know if I’d be able anyway, my throat doesn’t feel as if I could.

“You know, Ruki, if you won’t be so polite as to answer my honest, innocent question, I’d have to be as educative as possible and punish you for your brassiness…”

What the fuck…? He can do what he wants, seriously, I’m not going to move my lips. Not ever.

“If you don’t answer this second…”, he smirks, “I’ll kiss you.”


Oh no. Oh no nononononono that is unfair that is… I’m going to complain.

“HEY that is not - “, I start, tearing my eyes open, but the feeling of soft lips against mine instantly cuts me off. It’s not as if he was pressing his lips down on mine, he’s not, there’s just touch, but that’s all it needs to have me instantly fall silent, reach up and clutch his shirt - ONLY to not lose balance, really, cause I’m going really dizzy right now, I should just back away and off, shouldn’t be a problem, right?

“Nnnn…”, the sound he makes has me focus upon his face yet again. Oh damn. Illegally… beautiful. And me, I’m sure I’m looking like the last fool right now, and he’s all… what’s the word… he looks so … predatory.

“I never knew you were into kissing guys.”, he hums.

“AGHL”, I reply, uttering my wish for a sledge hammer to smash his brains. I am not into kissing guys I’m just…

He closes his eyes, slowly, suddenly, bridging the little gap between us that I didn’t even know was existing, and brings his plush lips fully down on mine, moving them gently against, once, twice, opening his a bit, flicking his tongue out to stroke my bottom lip - no I didn’t just moan -, then smirks, grins, licks over the length of my mouth, the grip of his hands tightening, pressing his warm, perfect body against me. He’s starting to suck at my lip, his movements growing stronger, his lips pressing harder against mine, his wet muscle gaining strength, and I just can’t help it, I can’t help it, the way my eyelids flutter, and parts of my body shiver that I never knew had muscles that were able to shiver, it just makes me part my lips, and suddenly his movements get aggressive, pushing his tongue between my lips with force - let me ignore the fact that I let him -, curling against the inside of them, then against my teeth, rubbing along my tongue, feeling it with his, sucking at it, making it dance with his…

… I’m just into kissing Uruha, I guess.

Fuck. Don’t stop.

I clutch and pull at his shirt, finally, leaning against him. pressing close to him, damn, I can feel his every muscle move against me, I can feel everything, my lips start to move, start to want, more, more, more, my tongue runs along his, pushes at it while I moan and -

- and then he leans back, lets go off me, checks his watch with that smirk I’ll hate, I know I will, and then looks up at me with a self-satisfied grin that could outdo Rei’s with ease.

“Oh wow.”, he says, “already that late. Need to head off.” Grinning like a bastard he winks at my staring self, me with my mouth gaping open as wide as a barn door.

He can’t be serious now and just leave, can he?

He backs off a couple of steps and chuckles, just about to turn around to do what I can hardly believe he’s actually doing. “Have to get back to the shoot, you know. Some people get up early to do things like those.“

Bastard. You fucking, teasing bastard.

He turns around again, already a couple of feet away. “Hey. I heard that.”

That’s it. You fucker.

“You heard nothing, you pretentious little hypocrite”, I snarl, step back and slam the door shut in less than the blink of an eye. You earned that slam, bitch.

Yeah, so maybe I didn’t mean that the way it sounded, but I’m quite sure he’d have a perfect little answer of his own ready. So it’s better the door is shut. It’s better the door is shut and solid between us and I can’t see his mocking smile.

Fucking bastard.

Only now that the door is closed, I realize that I had held my breath, gasp, and lean against the wood, trying to make my head stop spinning. And my knees are trembling. Fuck.

Beep Beep.

I jolt. Message?

I grab my phone from the back-pocket of my pants and acknowledge it with a scwol. Yeah, message. Flip it open.


”Are you leaning against the door? Watching my bum from that little peep-hole? Hehe. Stop cursing you little hypo and go back to sleep.”

”Argh!” Does he always have to have the last fucking word? There I was just about to calm down, safe in my home, and then he just ...

Fucking bastard.

Beep Beep.

No, damn you.


“… I heard that.”

So, yay - Semester is over, so that means I should have some time for fic -ups. [Hic-ups? Fic-ups? Fic-hiccups? xD] There are still some unfinished ones lying around .__.
Yeah yeah, 頑張りマオ。

Please let me know what you thought of this (for once totally smut-less) one. As I said, the first sort of humorous one that I up with. Maybe it’s a test to see whether people still read and comment even though there’s no sex? *laughs*

Nyaaarrr ~ Comments are LOVE ♥

Fanfiction Archive
7th-Aug-2008 01:33 am (UTC)
Holy shit am I first? o_o;
Heeeeyyy tharrrr; long time lurker and first time commenter on hereeee:

That was niceee =w= better than nice, actually. Just insert every word that is a word of praise here. If that made any sense to you, seeing that you're GREAT with words.

Seriously loved it. Not much more to say~
Smug!Uruha is teh schmex. Ruki is just his short grumpy self :D

To finish it off, I thank you for making my night. and filling my head with 'thoughts'.
7th-Aug-2008 01:49 am (UTC)
*laughs* You're lurking on my fics? Hehe~

Yeah, you're first. o.o *hands you her handmade, gazette-adorned prize for first-commenters* ... enjoy~

And it made sense to me and... thank you a lot for that. ^//^
Nnnnn I love smug!smexy!guitarists hehe... Or maybe just smug!generally

You're welcome, thank YOU, ne. Have fun with your 'thoughts', and... major lol at your icon, it's love.
7th-Aug-2008 02:18 am (UTC)
hahahah its really funny~ Uru can read ruki's mind??!!!! COOL! but Uru really big meanie hahahaahah XD poor Ru-chan~~
7th-Aug-2008 02:41 am (UTC)
^,- Who knows if he really can.

Thank you ^_^
7th-Aug-2008 03:16 am (UTC)
Uruha is a tease*pokes uruha*
He really do knows Ruki a lot to the point he knows what RUki is thinking XDD
7th-Aug-2008 11:27 am (UTC)
Hahahah yeah xD Blame it on that I love teases *laughs*
He does, ne ^ ^
7th-Aug-2008 05:17 am (UTC)

i rabbu you for this!!! XD

very interesting ficcu, dear. first time reading one of yours that was :smut-less: but i still liked it since you have a fun way of writing.

have to say mind-reading!uru was fun. but tormenting poor ru-kun like that....sexy....wait. i meant evil. gosh. but..it was..... both. XDD

ahahaha, again, sometimes i think you place yourself in ruki's shoes when you're writing your uruki ficcus. XD though i'd probably do the same. XDDD

thanks for putting these :thoughts: in my head. hopefully they'll take over my dreamland too. XDD
7th-Aug-2008 11:33 am (UTC)
Hahahah awwwww... thank you dear for reading, commenting and rabbuing >D

Well the depri fics are smutless as well ne. But yeah... first one that was actually to laugh over heh ^^

Sexy? Evil? ... rr... both? heheheh

*totally denying* Tseh. Whatever you think of me. *purses lips and does a Rukipout that she knows Uru won't be able to withstand* err, yeah, totally proved my point xP

You're welcome. And thanks again. =D Hoping the best for your dreams <3
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7th-Aug-2008 11:34 am (UTC)
Hahaha... Do you want me to resurrect you? xD ... Or shall I call Rei up to do that job? ... (Would that work at all, lol... xD)

Thank you for your comment ^____^ You're welcome <3
7th-Aug-2008 11:50 am (UTC) - Nnnnnnnnn....^^
Uru the tease! I almost felt Ruki's indignation myself...ggrrrrrrrrooooowwwllll!

Heeeheee pope in garters! You crack me up *imagines him examining his thighs in front of the Vatican bedroom mirror* XDDD
7th-Aug-2008 12:16 pm (UTC) - Re: Nnnnnnnnn....^^
Hahahahahha... Oh yes, does it make you want to slam Uruha against a wall? Heh.

OMFGS... ... You crack me up, too xDDDDD
Though I don't think I'd like to ... see the pope's... thighs... xD ... *shudder*
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7th-Aug-2008 08:49 pm (UTC)
Awww... Thank you Urudarling.

... People tend to fail in explaining what they feel when reading my stories, I find it somewhat amusing XD Thank you for your commen neeee

And... everybody has their own style, ne ^ ^
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7th-Aug-2008 10:27 pm (UTC)
Hehehe... I would have been surprised if you had not liked Uruha as something close to a sex god, honestly, hehe.

Thank you a lot for your comment. I appreciate it <3
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7th-Aug-2008 10:49 pm (UTC)
So God damn good~ x3
i.. i'm just speechless!

Why did you make me speechless! i just can't.. just.. Argh! *GLOMP-HUG-SMOOCH* ^3^ You Devil~~

Gonna put on memories~ ;'3
7th-Aug-2008 10:52 pm (UTC)
You think so? =D aww... I'm glad you liked it. Really really damn glad.

... I... I don't know why. Don't ask me ^ ^" I feel loved now ^//^
Devil? Who? Where?

I feel honored ~
8th-Aug-2008 01:35 am (UTC)
It was funny ^_^
the way uru could read ruki's mind *-*
you describe so well love O_O
8th-Aug-2008 02:05 am (UTC)
Thank you ^----^ ☆
Uru is just really special hehe.
Thank you a lot <33
8th-Aug-2008 03:48 am (UTC)
Awww jeez, that was awesome *-*
I love the way you described stunned Ruki and mean Uru-chan <3 Great job ^^
8th-Aug-2008 10:33 am (UTC)
Thank you a lot ^---^
Really, thank you =D It means a lot.
8th-Aug-2008 12:28 pm (UTC)
Aww, I have to thank you ^^
It's been a real pleasure reading this.
Wish to read more from you <3
8th-Aug-2008 06:25 pm (UTC)
Again I thank you in return ~.^
You can check out my Fanfiction archive, ne, it's posted at the end of the entry ^ ^ I haven't published humorous fics before, so if you want that, you'd have to wait a bit. ^ ^ The others are either angsty or smutty or both - Try Honey Lips if you like ^^
9th-Aug-2008 04:22 pm (UTC)
>__> . . .
You go, 'Ruha.
9th-Aug-2008 04:30 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the comment ~
28th-Aug-2008 02:32 pm (UTC)
That was hilarious...i needed that laugh

Uruha's such a tease i swear. And our cute little shorty, Ruki...man, someone's in a grumpy mood

I loved it, it was great XD
28th-Aug-2008 09:24 pm (UTC)
*laughs* I'm glad it made you laugh. I remember I enjoyed writing it. ... I love Uruha as a tease :3 And hey... he just woke up xD It's understandable he's grumpy XP

Thank youuu~
7th-Jun-2011 05:08 pm (UTC)
It's so lovely and beautiful and funny... I am delighted!
Would you give me the permission to translate this fic into Russian?
Please? ^^"
7th-Jun-2011 05:31 pm (UTC)
Oh, I'm glad you like it that much may I ask how you found it?
I've not yet had such a request, but I guess it's okay, if you can guarantee you won't make any profit with my story, and post it with my name as author (Outori@livejournal; and yours as the translator) and proper credits with link back to the original source, being this entry here. I guess you will post your translation somewhere online, right? Once you posted it, please comment here with a link to it.
Thank you for your cooperation. I'm looking forward to hearing from you again.
Roaded on Jul 19th 2018, 9:19 pm GMT.